How To Deal With Peer Pressure

By treating them in ways that telegraph you believe they can choose wisely and take responsibility for those choices, it will boost their own confidence. Set age-appropriate limits Kids need to have a safety net, even when they are old enough to make many decisions for themselves. Knowing mom and dad are waiting up for the “I’m safe” phone call encourages kids to think twice about their actions.

You might even wonder if the friendship is over or needs to end. Dealing with these emotions can be hard, so use a journal to sort out your feelings and help you cope with the stress. Change the subject if you’re uncomfortable responding to questions. Avoiding how to deal with peer pressure the question might send the message that you’re still interested but don’t want to respond. If you’ve outgrown certain relationships, let them go and try to surround yourself with people who appreciate your ideas, lifestyle and choices without judging them.

Ways For Your Child To Resist Peer Pressure

Peer pressure that encourages a person to do harmful or dangerous things is obviously negative. But sometimes negative peer pressure takes a more subtle form, such as encouraging a student to do something that detracts from their studies. Teens should never feel the pressure to say yes when their gut tells them no. Having the ability to say no and mean it might even be lifesaving. Not so easy when teens feel their peer relationships may be at stake.

how to deal with peer pressure

Humans have a natural tendency to listen to and learn from others in the same age group. Make sure they know ahead of time what they are and are not allowed to do.

Dealing With Peer Pressure

Remind your teens that words are only a small part of the story we tell. Body language is also a big factor in what we communicate to others. Saying no while smiling and leaning into someone could send mixed signals. No is more clearly communicated through body language when you stand your ground, make eye contact, and remain calm. Sometimes the best strategy is just walking away and distancing yourself from potential trouble. For example, if someone offers you a drink and you want to say no but feel awkward, say you’re on medication or have to get up early the next day.

Whichever child God has given you, here are three things that can help them deal with peer pressure. You may have a child who, like Jeff, seems to have been born resistant to peer pressure. Your child is someone who the crowd can try to push all day, but they don’t budge.

how to deal with peer pressure

Apply your own positive pressure Their actions may seem to signal constant rebellion, but in fact, it’s natural for kids to want to please their parents. Parents should remember they have a strong influence over their child, even when it appears they’re ignoring you. Applying positive pressure, such as encouraging your student to study more or take a tougher class, can result in them actually doing it. Make a plan Many kids give in to peer pressure because they don’t see a graceful way out. Help them find one by creating a plan that will get them out of a bad situation with little consequence. One of the best options is for your child to text the letter “X” to you.

How To Handle Peer Pressure

We all make mistakes and wrong choices, but what is important is what you learn from your past choices and how you overcome those mistakes and wrong choices. Resisting negative peer pressure will help improve your self-esteem, your physical health, and your mental health. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Risk-taking behaviors may be seen as a fun break from the norm of school and family obligations. You may feel guilt or shame at the beginning of resisting negative peer pressure but stay strong through it all and remember your core values. Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring , summer (things get hot!), fall , and winter . Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are.

If something is peer-tested and peer-approved, then they are apt to try the thing out, including illicit drugs. Drug use and drinking is promoted as relieving boredom, especially since it gives a group of peers something to do together.

  • However, there are multiple ways to resist it so that you can enjoy your life.
  • Spend time with people who lift you up, not those who bring you down.
  • As we enter into adulthood, we may still occasionally be driven by reward-seeking behavior.
  • You can stay away from peers who pressure you to do stuff you know is wrong.

For instance, suggesting playing basketball or watching a movie can give pushback to peer drug invitations. Those friends who join up with that plan are voting against drug use, and the invitation to use drugs loses its power and influence. Doing drugs can be equated in a young person’s mind with being a member of a group. In this scenario, the desire to bond may outstrip any fear about drug abuse. If you have fallen for negative peer pressure in the past, you can learn from it.

Dr Lee Warren

The main difference between negative and positive peer pressure is that positive peer pressure encourages healthy behavior. Peer pressure can take on forms that have a little or nothing to do with drugs or alcohol. People can be pressured into partaking in certain activities or behaving in a certain manner. No matter what the case, peer pressure is a difficult situation that encourages people to do things that they would not normally do.

Since there are a lot of ways you can feel peer pressured, it’s important to know how prevalent peer pressure is on various populations. Males at this age are trying to ensure they maintain their gender role stereotypes and often relate these behaviors to masculinity. Males at this age who defy gender norms tend to face more social consequences and are conditioned to then behave and act in a way that is in accordance to the majority. This type of peer pressure is less invasive on our internal voice to behave a certain way, however, it can validate a behavior or activity we want to try but haven’t tried yet. It can be unspoken but also influence how we feel about ourselves. BetterHelp has over 20,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy.

Positive Peer Pressure

Though young people might not say it that often, they really do want to know about the challenges their parents face and how they handled those challenges. Is this something you’d feel comfortable discussing with friends and family? If you instinctively want to hide your action or behavior, it’s a negative. Being pushed to do something by well-meaning friends should make a person feel good about their decisions, whether it’s choosing to study more often or help someone in need. This peer pressure is actually a beneficial influence that opens up new horizons, or reinforces the decision to stay away from bad behavior.

  • Agree that you’ll have each other’s backs on certain things, such as not drinking too much.
  • Friendships that emerge during adolescence tend to be more complex, more exclusive, and more consistent than during earlier childhood.
  • You do not need to change just to fit in with the group of people you are hanging out with.
  • Withdrawal from activities and social groups that the child once enjoyed.
  • It can take a lot of time to unlearn some of the behaviors learned throughout their lifetime.

When you have a strong support system, you’ll be more motivated to succeed and make healthy choices. When pressure is high, and we’re feeling particularly vulnerable, we may decide on the easy choice. Understanding how you feel and acknowledging negative emotions can help steer a person away from making poor choices. Avoid peers that can cause self-doubt, lack of self-confidence, and who may disregard your feelings completely.

Peer Pressure: How To Deal With It

When you are in this situation remind yourself of what your values are and how you are going to stick to you plan. You do not need to change just to fit in with the group of people you are hanging out with. Develop relationships with others from different backgrounds and are outside of your main friend group. Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning,New York Timesbest-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books includingThe Birth Order Book,Have a New Kid by FridayandMaking Children Mind Without Losing Yours. Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger.

What Is Peer Pressure?

The important thing is for adults to give teens alternatives to getting themselves out of tricky situations with their dignity intact. Very often, teens are influenced by the behavior and choices of other young adults. Peers who encourage your teen to participate in harmful behavior might seem fun and happy, but they are not. As a parent, you can encourage your teen to seek positive relationships with others who respect them and not place unfair pressure on them.